Holy shit last night was wild.
I literally just woke up and need to tell the story...
For context, with all the womb stuff lately, I'm being supported by an amazing acupuncturist, Kim Smailes, who has been helping restore regularity to my cycles and vitality to my kidneys and adrenals.
2 nights ago, my blood started flowing again after a few weeks of not. I had a super tender day yesterday, tuned in to the sadness and grief in the world.
Interesting timing, as I was also in a creative space, as it's mixed with opening the doors to Circle Keeper Training sacred space holder today. Taking a dose of my own medicine... holding sacred space for myself.
So... last night when I went to bed, I felt SO achey in my whole abdomen, right down into my thighs. It felt like my ligaments were being slowly torn from the bones. I breathed and was fully present to the sensations. I thought if I can breathe and become one with it, maybe I could sleep. I also had some CBD oil to help take the edge off... 🌿
At one point it was so intense, I thought fuck this. Any normal person would have a panadol.
It was excruciating. I was digging my fingers deep into my tissues to try and ease the pain, but it wasn't helping.
Then I realised, this is probably what some women feel like in childbirth. My births have been ecstatic as I transmute the intensity into euphoria with sound, breath and movement.
Aha! I thought. This is a form of labour I'm in. So I started a deep growling sound in my throat, directing the vibrations into my pelvis. The effect was instant. The sensations eased, so I kept going.
Then suddenly, a wave of emotion erupted through me which came up from my womb.
Deep grief and rage at the violation of the mother, both human and earth, over eons.
It was so huge, I felt all the pain in my womb flowing through my voice and tears, a deep ancient sorrow from all time at how mothers and the earth have been treated.
I'm in the caravan out the front yard so I was half aware of the noise I was making, and really I wanted to scream and roar so loud!!! It was so intense.
I got on hands and knees, buried my face into my pillow and howled all the pain, agony, grief and rage from my womb through me.
This went for a while. Until there was no more pain, no more charge. My womb still felt tender so I placed my large rose quartz on my belly and felt such deep calm from the earth.
Then I gently drifted off to sleep.
Far out, how amazing are our wombs?!!
Tuned into the whole cosmos and life itself.
And to think... I could have had panadol and avoided all that, which is the standard approach for most.
Don't feel, push it away, make it stop.
Or, go in, listen deeply, surrender, receive, know your body is wise and let it work it's magic through you 🌹
PS if you feel called to deepen into your wisdom as a woman on this earth, and hold space for other women to be present to all that arises, I invite you to join me in the Circle Keeper Training for sacred space holders.
Today is the last day to receive the bonus one year membership in The Temple with me included.
If you want to go even deeper... join me in The Sacred Feminine Way Facilitator Training, a deep dive mentorship into women's mysteries, transformational facilitation and developing your unique business, the sacred feminine way.